Couple Compatibility Quiz (Relationship Compatibility Test)
Research-informed: named relationship research (Gottman, similarity research). A self-reflection tool, not a diagnosis.
By Suraj Giri · Reviewer for this method: not yet appointed (see our editorial policy)
The couple compatibility quiz is a Research-informed questionnaire that scores a relationship on nine named dimensions (communication, values, life goals, intimacy, conflict style, humour, finances, trust, emotion) and compares two partners' answers.
What is a couple compatibility quiz?
A couple compatibility quiz is a set of statements about a relationship that one or both partners rate, scored by topic so you can see where your answers meet and where they differ. People call it a test, a quiz or a relationship compatibility questionnaire. It's the same thing under each name, and this page calls it the couple compatibility quiz.
The quiz is the questionnaire route to love compatibility. It asks you, where the other tools on this site read names or birthdays. It shows how you answered, and it can't observe your relationship.
What does the couple compatibility quiz measure?
The couple compatibility quiz measures nine dimensions, with the same number of statements for each:
- Communication: how you talk day to day and whether each of you feels heard.
- Values: what each of you thinks matters most.
- Life goals: where you each want the next years to go.
- Intimacy: affection, closeness and how easily you talk about both.
- Conflict style: what happens between you when you disagree.
- Humour: whether you laugh at the same things.
- Finances: how you earn, spend and save.
- Trust: whether you rely on each other's word.
- Emotion: how you respond to each other's feelings.
The nine dimensions are our choice of topics, not a full list of what matters between two people.
How to check compatibility for couples?
To check compatibility as a couple, take the quiz on this page, alone in SOLO mode or together in DUO mode. The check takes four steps:
- Read each statement about your relationship.
- Rate it from 1 (strongly disagree) to 5 (strongly agree).
- Read your score for each of the nine dimensions and the dimension you rated lowest.
- In DUO, send the link, and when your partner finishes, read where your answers agreed and differed.
Five of the statements, as examples:
- Most days, we catch up on what happened in each other's day.
- We follow through on what we promise each other.
- We hold a similar picture of the next five years.
- We agree on how much of our income to save.
- A shared joke can ease tension between us.
Every statement is worded so that 5 means more of a good thing, which keeps the scores easy to read.
Can couples take the compatibility quiz separately?
Yes. In DUO mode each of you answers on your own phone, and your partner answers without seeing your ratings first. One of you finishes first and shares a link; no email and no app are needed. The comparison appears on the second phone when that partner finishes. The link holds the first partner's answers and no names, and nothing is stored anywhere.
Is the couple compatibility quiz free?
Yes. The couple compatibility quiz is free, with no email and no account, and the result appears on the page when you finish.
What do your couple compatibility results mean?
SOLO scores describe how you rated your relationship on each dimension; DUO scores describe how closely the two of you answered the same statements. They aren't a verdict on the relationship or on how compatible you are. The table reads the three things the result shows.
| What you see | What it means | What it does not mean |
|---|---|---|
| A dimension score from 0 to 100 | The average of your own ratings on that dimension, moved onto a new scale: all ratings of 1 give 0, all 3 give 50, all 5 give 100 | It is not your partner's view, and it is not a grade of the relationship |
| The overall score | The plain average of the nine dimension scores | It is not a chance of staying together, and it forecasts nothing |
| A DUO agreement score from 0 to 100 | How close your two sets of ratings were on that dimension: identical answers give 100; answers at opposite ends on every statement give 0 | A high agreement score does not mean you both rated things highly; two people can agree that something is going badly |
| The lowest dimension | The dimension with the lowest score; when two are level, the one that comes first in the fixed list is shown | It is what you answered today, not a problem this site will sell you a fix for |
A higher or lower score changes nothing else on the page: every result shows the same three things.
What should you do about your lowest-scoring dimension?
Treat your lowest-scoring dimension as the topic to talk about first, not as a fault. Three steps make that conversation easier:
- Read what that dimension's statements asked, in the list of nine above, and consider whether you would answer the same on another day.
- If you took it alone, take it together in DUO and compare that one dimension.
- Pick one statement where your ratings differ most and talk through why each of you chose your number.
A score is information about how you answered today, and the conversation it starts belongs to the two of you.
Whatever the lowest dimension is, the quiz that found it goes by more than one name.
Is a relationship compatibility test the same as a couple compatibility quiz?
Yes. The relationship compatibility test is the same Research-informed quiz taken SOLO or DUO; DUO compares both partners' answers on the nine dimensions. People also type relationship calculator, couple calculator or free relationship compatibility test, and all three searches lead to this one quiz. A partner compatibility test and a compatibility test for couples are two more names for it.
What research is the couple compatibility quiz based on?
The couple compatibility quiz is informed by two named bodies of relationship research, and it is not a validated clinical instrument. The two are:
- John Gottman's observational research on couples. Gottman named four conflict behaviours the Four Horsemen: criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling. The Conflict style statements ask about their opposites. John Gottman's research reports that about 69 percent of couples' conflicts are perpetual, rooted in lasting differences, rather than solvable.
- Research on similarity between partners. This field studies whether couples who resemble each other in values and goals report more satisfaction.
The questions are our own, the nine dimensions are our choice, and no study has tested this quiz. That's why the label says Research-informed and not more.
For married couples
The statements work for married and unmarried couples alike, because none of them assumes a wedding, a shared home or children. Questions that only a marriage raises get their own page, the marriage compatibility test.
Track your days together
The quiz is a snapshot of how you answered today. The running total of your time as a couple is kept by a different tool, the days together counter.
Couple questions with a longer answer
What compatibility means in a relationship gets its own page: the full treatment is in relationship compatibility. Six rules of thumb that couples ask about get a one-sentence answer here.
What is the 2-2-2 rule for couples?
The 2-2-2 rule for couples is a date night every two weeks, a weekend away every two months and a week away every two years; it is a folk rule from social media, not research.
What is the 7-7-7 rule for couples?
The 7-7-7 rule for couples is a date every seven days, a night away every seven weeks and a holiday every seven months, and the Gottman Institute itself calls it a viral social media meme.
What is the 7 7 7 rule for married couples?
For married couples the 7 7 7 rule keeps the same rhythm, one date a week, one overnight every seven weeks and one holiday every seven months, and it is a folk rule, not research.
What is the 3-3-3 rule in marriage and how does it work?
In marriage the 3-3-3 rule usually means the 3 by 3 rule: each week, three hours of undivided time together and three hours alone for each partner; it is a social media rule, not research.
What is the 3 6 9 rule for dating?
The 3 6 9 rule for dating sets checkpoints at three, six and nine months of a new relationship, roughly the honeymoon, conflict and decision stages; it is a folk pacing guide, not research.
What are 21 juicy questions for couples quiz?
21 juicy questions for couples is a popular name for a list of 21 conversation starters, not a scored quiz, and that list belongs on this site's questions for couples page.
The couple compatibility quiz is one way to check your compatibility on this site, and all of them are listed on the compatibility test hub.
How we calculate it
- There are nine dimensions with four statements each, answered from 1 to 5.
- Each dimension's average is moved onto a 0 to 100 scale.
- The overall figure is the average of the nine, and the lowest dimension is named.
- Every statement needs an answer. A skipped one is never filled in for you.
The full rule, in plain words and in pseudocode, is on the methodology page.
Sources
- The Gottman Institute, Research: Couples: Source of the 69 percent figure, attributed to Gottman and Levenson's longitudinal work
- Gottman and Silver, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work (1999): Book source of the perpetual problems figure
- Gottman, What Predicts Divorce? (1994): The Four Horsemen